Razor Blades
by DisneyStar4Ever
Summary: When Benson doesn't show up to work that day, Mordecai knows something horribly wrong has happened and when he goes to Bensons apartment to investigate, he ends up bargaining for more than he asked for. Mordecai/Benson friendship. HUMAN
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

**A/N REMEMBER, CHARACTERS ARE HUMAN**

Benson had been acting strange all week and it had been bothering Mordecai every day. Every time the blue haired male walked past his boss, they would only glance at eachother, but Bensons eyes were red and bloodshot and that's what bit at Mordecai's mind when the red head looked away, and Mordecai instantly knew it was because he didn't want to see him.

As the days passed, Benson begun wearing long shirts and pants reaching his ankles despite the warm sun beating down on the house, bathing the park in a yellow light. This raised Mordecai's suspicions and he did have a theory, but he shook it off, doubting himself as soon as it popped in his mind. As if that would ever happen...

But when Friday came, the theory jumped back in his brain and as Mordecai sat on the stair next to Rigby, only Skips was there, making Mordecai begin to shake, a feeling of horrid worry stirring in his gut. He could only sit and wait for his and Rigby's names to be called, promptly followed by their job for the day.

"Mordecai and Rigby, you'll be raking the leaves."

Mordecai silently thanked Skips for giving them an easier job than what every other employee were assigned, but being given a task that even a duck with no eyes could do didn't settle his churning stomach. When Skips lowered the clipboard to his side, everyone stood and went off to their jobs. Mordecai, too consumed with anxiety to question not just Skips, but everyones behavior at the situation, followed Rigby to the tool shed, where two rakes were hanging on a hook each. After grabbing them, the brown haired male plonked his on the grass and dragged it behind him. Mordecai on the other hand, propped his rake on his right shoulder and carried it with his right hand, the fingers curled around the end of the stick, holding it.

When they got to where a pile of leaves had gathered, Mordecai threw his rake on the ground, making the leaves scatter everywhere. He looked up at the brown haired male next to him. "Ok dude, we're gonna have to split if we wanna get all these leaves rakes up, so you go over there." He paused to point to the left, where brightly colored leaves were strewn on the ground. "And I'll stay here."

Rigby frowned. "Aw why do I have to go over there? Why can't you go over there?"

"'Cause I'm staying over here." Mordecai said. "Besides, there are less leaves over there than there are over here."

Rigby looked over to where he was supposed to go to see Mordecai was right. Although both boys leaves were laid out on the ground, Rigby knew that going by birds eye view, he would see he had half the amount of leaves Mordecai had on his side. He groaned anyway and reluctantly dragged himself to the left side, away from Mordecai, who was already getting to work on his side. Rigby began pushing leaves into piles, not bothering to actually pick up his rake, thus resulting in the once-neat leaves to spread around everywhere. After a few minutes of this, he looked behind him and uttered another groan, seeing the leaves scattered everywhere. He threw down his rake, deciding to give up, though one glance at Mordecai's side made him doubt what he was about to do, but the doubt vanished as quickly as it had come and he smiled. Turning around, he made a poor effort to put his leaves in a huge pile, making sure to get every leaf on his side. He stood back, studied it, then dropped the rake and backed up, far away from it. He stopped and looked around. Figuring it was a reasonable distance, he smiled wide and looked straight at the brightly colored pile. Mordecai, hearing nothing from Rigby's side, turned with his rake in hand, and his mouth dropped when he saw the leaves in a smaller pile. His eyes darted back and forth on the brown haired male and his eyebrows furrowed when he saw Rigby standing a few feet away from it, his feet planted firmly on the ground.

Rigby smiled a tooth-filled grin and shot forward. Mordecai, now realizing what he was about to do, yelled out. He curled his knees up to his chest, hugging his legs together. "GERONIMO!

Mordecai shielded his eyes as the pile burst, colored leaves flying in the air for a moment before slowly falling back to the ground. A small giggle from the younger male quickly turned to full out laughter as he spread his arms and legs out, moving them up and down with a grin. Mordecai rolled his eyes, watching him. He threw his rake down and walked over. "Rigby."

The male in question lifted his head. "What?"

"You know you're gonna have to rake those leaves up again, right?"

Rigby stuck out his tongue and lay his head back down, resuming his arm-and-leg-waving, making leaves slowly fall off the pile and on the ground again. "Isn't that what mother nature is for?"

"No. That's what we're here for."

"What? To rake leaves?"

"To clean up the leaves." Mordecai corrected.

Rigby sighed. "Ugh why did we get this job?"

"Because Skips gave us this job."

Rigby lifted his head again, pausing to speak to him. "Why was Skips here anywhere? Where's Benson?"

The question struck Mordecai. He had almost forgotten about him, had it been for the nagging thought in the back of his mind. He shrugged casually, hoping Rigby wasn't willing to show his smart-ness in this situation. "I don't know. Maybe it's his day off or something."

"Maybe." Rigby said with a shrug. Mordecai let out a breath of relief as Rigby lay his head back down, but he didn't move his arms or legs. "I could lay here for the rest of my life. Lying on a pile of leaves isn't as uncomfortable as it seems."

Mordecai frowned. "Dude, get up." He glanced around at his side to confirm his next sentence in his mind before saying it aloud. "I've already finished raking the leaves on my side."

Rigby lifted his head again, turning it to the right to look at Mordecai's side. When he saw the grass completely leaf free, the leaves having been shifted into a huge pile sitting near a tree. He sighed and jumped off the leaves. "Fine." He mumbled, then rose his voice.

"But I'm only doing this so I can get an early break."

Mordecai smiled slightly and watched the smaller male grab his rake from the ground. He began raking the leaves halfheartedly, his shoulders slumped. Mordecai made a move to make him hurry up, but he knew this was the fastest pace Rigby would go when it came to work and, he had to remind himself, half heartedly or not, at least he was actually doing his work. The blue haired male backed into the tree on his side and leant his rake next to him, crossing his arms over his chest, not taking his eyes from Rigby, who's back was facing him, his rake slowly dragging across the ground as he pulled clump after clump of leaves into a pile, that was gradually growing as the minutes wore by. This left Mordecai to his thoughts.

The earlier question that Rigby had asked snapped at the blue haired males mind and he couldn't get rid of it, no matter how many times he shook his head when Rigby wasn't looking or the distractions he purposefully put onto himself, just to shut his mind up. It aggravated him to know end, but the aggravation was true worry and deep down, he knew it was. Soon, another though cut through the other, which soon became multiple thoughts, that quickly turned to theories, which morphed into images. Horrid images. Mordecai closed his eyes tight and slowly, the theories left, the thoughts left, the images left, leaving various heart pounding, nauseating questions.

What was it that made Mordecai so concerned, so anxious for his boss, that left sweaty palms and a racing heart to come upon him? Was he really this worried about the state of the red head? And if so, why? Why did he have these particular things happen to him? Why not anyone else? Why, why, why-

"Mordecai."

Mordecai opened his eyes and if a switch had been flicked, everything vanished from his mind. Rigby was standing in front of him, his rake grasped tightly in his right hand, no sweat gracing his forehead or body. He frowned and raised his left hand, snapping his finger and forefinger in front of the taller mans face. "Mordo, dude."

"Yeah?" Mordecai replied. He tried desperately to calm his heart, which was beating rapidly.

Rigby lowered his left hand to his side. "I've finished raking the leaves. Now can we go on break?"

Mordecai pushed himself off the tree and uncrossed his arms. He leant sideways slightly to look behind the brown haired male. A pile of brightly colored leaves were sitting in the middle of Rigby's side, a few leaves having fallen around the pile, showing the smaller male had raked them only a few moments ago before approaching him. Mordecai shifted back to his original position, fixing his eyes on Rigbys waiting face, smiling. "Sure dude. We can totally go on break."

A grin broke from Rigby's pouting expression. "Yes!"

He fist pumped in the air with his left hand then lowered it, turned and ran in the direction of the shed, dragging the rake behind him. Mordecai shook his head at the smaller males immature behavior then grabbed his own rake and slung it over his right shoulder, walking in the direction of the shed, an excited Rigby up ahead, the teeth of the rake winking in the sun as he got further and further away from him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

After putting the rakes away, Mordecai shut the shed door and bent down to lock it. When he had done so, he looked sideways to see Rigby smiling at him, mischief in his eyes. Mordecai straightened, smiling himself as he walked towards the smaller male. "Video games?"

Mordecai stopped. As much as he wanted to play video games with his best bud, he needed to check up on Benson first. It was highly unusual for their boss to be at home without any notice of a reason why. Plus, Benson had _never _taken a day off from work and this only raised the blue haired mans suspicions.

He slowly shook his head. "Uh, sorry dude, but I-" He stopped mid sentence. Should he tell him the truth? Or lie? "I think I'm gonna go to the cofee shop."

"Aw what? Why?" Rigby's face crumpled. He frowned and crossed his arms.

"'Cause I'm thirsty. I'll be back to play you video games, don't worry."

Rigby uncrossed his arms. He stood still for about 10 seconds then sighed. "Ugh fine. But you better bring me back a donut."

"Of course dude."

Rigby turned and walked in the house. When the door had shut, Mordecai let out a long breath. He turned and walked away, down to the park gates and across the road to Bensons apartment.

* * *

"Benson?" Mordecai knocked on the door with his right hand curled in a fist. He paused to hear an answer, but there was none. Mordecai's eyebrow furrowed. He thought Benson was asleep and so didn't knock again but he abandoned the thought when he realized that Benson would never sleep in on a work day.

Grasping the doorknob, he turned it slowly and walked in. "Benson?"

No answer.

"You here?" Mordecai called. He shut the door and walked around his boss' apartment. Seeing no sign of him, he became more confused. Thats when his eyes caught the bathroom door. It was as if he was being pulled towards it. He had no intention of going in there, but he did, gently pushing the door open with his right hand flat against the wood.

"Ben-" His breath caught in his throat. He stared at his boss sitting on the white rug, now stained with red. His chest felt very heavy and his mind was spinning. "Benson?" He choked out. Tears were welling up in his eyes. Bensons head snapped up and his eyes grew wide.

"M-Mordecai?" He asked, the blood from his almost finished cut dribbling on the carpet creating a red and white mess.

Mordecai dropped to his knees, blood seeping on the floor. His brown eyes darted back and forth, taking in the scene before him, sick beginning to rise in his throat.

"Benson..." A whisper managed to escape his lips. The red head raised his head, the razor frozen in his hand, his blue eyes widening when they set on the man across from him. "Why..."

Bensons eyes narrowed, tears pushing through till they streamed down his cheeks. Choosing to ignore the man, he pushed the razor deeper into his skin, the blade making another dark red line to join the others up his arm.

Mordecais hand reached upward and grasped the razor, covering Bensons hand, which was cold to the bone, despite the warmth in the room. The red head looked at him again in surprise and anger, but he didn't say a word. They caught in his throat before he even opened his mouth.

"Please...stop this..." Mordecai whispered. Tears began to stream down his cheeks. He didn't let go of his boss's hand.

A harsh glare fell upon Bensons eyes and he lifted his other hand to take Mordecai's off his, leaving the blue haireds hand to fall limply back on the tiled floor. He looked back at the razor that was poised on his skin, a small cut starting to bleed. Unfinished.

"No...let me finish. I'm almost finished." He whispered, pulling the razor to make the cut bleed fully. A hiss pushed past his gritted teeth as he lifted the razor to rest more up his arm, a new piece of pale flesh to make red.

Mordecai watched him for a few more seconds, his heart heavy. Why? Why was he doing this? In a flash, he reached up and snatched the razor from the older mans pale hand, leaving another unfinished cut, blood slowly seeping from the vein and dripping down his arm.

Bensons head jerked up. His eyes burned in anger and he lurched forward.

"Give it back! Give me back the razor! I haven't finished!"

Mordecai jumped back with every lurch Benson gave. He held the razor from arms length, hot, angry tears streaming down both their cheeks. The blue haired males back hit the door and he gasped, keeping the razor in his grip. Benson frowned as he made another jerk towards it, repeating the same words over and over again. But Mordecai never gave in. He held the razor high in the air, blade up.

Soon, Bensons words became whispers as they died in his throat. Tears wouldn't stop streaming down his cheeks. He tasted salt as he opened his mouth again, trying to spit the words out, but he couldn't. Instead, he yelled something that made both men freeze.

"I haven't finished my art!"

Silence fell across the room like heavy rain. The red heads gaze held Mordecai's, but dropped to the floor as quickly as it had risen. The blue haired males eyes took in everything in that short moment; the paleness of his skin from unexplained reasons, the dried up cuts from years of this tragic secret, the messy hair he wore everyday from stress.

From his work.

Mordecai felt his heart drop. "Art?" He choked out, finally managing to find his voice.

Benson kept his mouth shut, the unfinished cut beginning to dry. He didn't raise his head, keeping his eyes low and his thoughts to himself.

"What art Benson?" Mordecai said, lowering the razor to his side, putting the emphasize on "art", hoping the red head would let him look at him.

The red heads shoulders slumped, it was a sigh. He silently turned, so his back was facing the blue haired man and without a word or a sound, lifted his shirt up to reveal his art to Mordecai.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**A/N This chapter is spun from the brilliant mind of dtskgirl, an awesome internet friend of mine who came up with this idea when I had none. Thank you gurl! 3 Hope ya like it!**

Tears formed in Mordecai's eyes, but he didn't feel them as they spilled down his cheeks. He was too numb with shock to speak, his hand flying to his mouth, his heart breaking into two as his eyes followed the red marks on Bensons back, dried up from him having done this long ago, it seemed. The razor slipped from his grasp and dropped on the carpet, spinning twice before falling flat on a light pink patch of what once was white.

Benson breathed out through his mouth. He closed his eyes and waited for Mordecai to speak.

"H-how long?" Mordecai choked out. He was in too much shock to say another word and he was surprised that he managed to actually say something other than stand there for the next half hour.

Benson swallowed, his eyes still closed, "A few months," he whispered.

Mordecai almost collapsed. He held on to the towel rail, his knees buckling. He felt sick. Really sick. "Benson, you-you have to tell someone about this!" Mordecai yelled out the last word, hoping it would have an impact on his boss, "You need help-"

"THEY WON'T DO ANYTHING!" Benson shouted. Mordecai's eyes grew wide. Still gripping the rail, he pushed himself up just as Benson let go of his shirt.

He turned slowly and when he did, Mordecai now saw the cuts on his wrists; the cuts that Benson was finishing off before he burst into the bathroom.

"I-" Benson started. He looked up and his eyes locked with Mordecai's. "I have to finish my art. It's not finished." He repeated, his voice calm and smooth.

He ran out the door and Mordecai turned sharply. He chased after his boss, his head pounding. What was he doing?

Mordecai's question was answered when he stopped short in the kitchen. Standing there was Benson, a small but sharp knife in his hand, the drawer where he got it from open fully. The blade was glinting in the sunlight piercing through the gaps of the blinds in the kitchen window and Mordecai caught sight of his own horror stricken reflection.

Benson had seen him and looked up, his lips pulled in a frown. "Mordecai, leave me alone. Let me finish my art." That smooth tone again.

Mordecai was shaking. His eyes were on the sharp blade, hovering over Bensons pale skin; a part that hadn't been reddened. "It's not art Benson. You're killing yourself." Mordecai's voice was shaking.

Benson shook his head, "You don't understand. No one does. Now get out of my apartment or I'll use a bigger knife."

Mordecai swallowed. He stepped forward and before Benson could react, he grabbed the blade and started pulling on it, him using both hands to do so. Benson scowled at him. He tried to snatch it back, but the blue haired man was stronger.

"Mordecai, let go."

"Stop doing this Benson."

"No. Not until I've finished."

Mordecai gave one more tug but Benson pulled it back. They wrestled for the knife, Benson holding the knife and Mordecai grasping the blade.

Mordecai gritted his teeth. He almost had it. Almost...

His eyes widened as a sharp pain seared through his palm. The knife dropped and the blade clattered on the ground, now smeared in Mordecai's blood.

Mordecai stared down at his hand. He gripped his wrist with his other hand, trying to stop the blood. He started crying at the immense pain in his hand.

"Look what you did!" Mordecai looked up at Benson, his eyes sharp and wild. The knife had sliced diagonally through his palm and was bleeding heavily. Blood was trailing down his hand. "You see what you did?" He said through gritted teeth.

Benson was in complete shock. He watched his employee cry, the tears splashing on the floor; hot, angry tears. Aimed at him.

"Mordecai, I-"

Mordecai cried out in agony and fell to the floor. He took off his jacket and wrapped his hand in it, but the blood just seeped through no less than 30 seconds. He groaned.

Benson ran through the house trying to find a first aid kit and when he found it, he came back to find Mordecai pressing the jacket into his palm, tears streaming down his cheeks.

Without a word, Benson knelt down and slowly moved the jacket away. He gasped when he saw how deep the wound was. He got out a large bandage and started to wrap it around his hand.

"I'm so sorry Mordecai." Benson whispered. He swallowed, feeling close to tears, "I didn't mean-"

Mordecai breathed heavily. It hurt but he didn't want that to show. "It's ok Benson." He whispered back.

When Benson had finished, he stood, the kit in one hand, the knife in the other. He placed both on the bench then turned.

Mordecai stood up slowly. He picked up his jacket, but didn't put it on.

"Mordecai, I'm really sorry. It was an accident I swear-"

"Benson," Mordecai started. He looked him in the eye, "all I want is for you to stop this. This isn't art. You're killing yourself. And if you keep this up, you'll have to go talk to someone. Don't apolgize for this." He motioned to his bandaged hand which didn't hurt as much as it did before, "I understand it was an accident. But I hope you learnt something from it."

Benson nodded as if he were a little kid learning something new from his mother. "I did. And I promise I won't cut anymore."

Mordecai smiled for the first time since he had got there, "Good."

Benson closed his eyes and let out a shuddery breath. "Mordecai."

"Yeah?"

Benson opened his eyes. "I-" He started to cry. "I-'

Mordecai wrapped his arms around him, pulling him in a hug. "It's ok, Benson."

Benson held him tightly and sobbed in his chest. All the emotion he had held in when cutting. It hit him hard.

He finally pulled back and when he did, Mordecai's shirt was soaked.

He sniffed. "Thanks Mordecai."

Mordecai swallowed. "You're welcome. You gonna be alright?" He asked softly.

Benson looked up. "Yeah, I'll be fine."

"Ok." Mordecai turned and started to walk away. He had only gone 3 steps when he felt a hand on his arm.

"What are you gonna tell the guys when they see your hand?"

Mordecai looked at his bandaged hand, his mind running for an answer. "I'll just tell them I got in an accident at the coffee shop."

Benson let go of his arm. "Ok." He smiled.

Mordecai smiled then walked to the door. Benson watched him go then when the door shut, he sighed, his chest suddenly feeling heavy from what had just occured but he felt happy knowing there was someone who looked out for him, and he was surprised that he hadn't even known up till now.

_~ Help is always there, even in the most unexpected people in the most unexpected places ~_


End file.
